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Chris Pitts's avatar

Hi Bob. I have been following you for a while, and like your often wise takes on things.

This article resonated more strongly than many though. I am in a very similar situation as Quentin - having been an independent technical coach for 20-odd years, I have had to take refuge in full time positions in companies, and like Quentin I am finding absolutely zero appetite for meaningful change despite plenty of low hanging fruit, which is hugely frustrating. The need for "two to tango" (and change) is something emphasised by any half-decent coaching course - the coachee has to *want* to change. You cannot just leap in and tell people to change.

The question is what to do when caught in that situation? A wise person once advised me thus: Grit your teeth, and take the paycheque if you need it, but look for an escape route since working against your values will eventually wear you down. But do find and help those who want help while you're there.

Gunnar R. Fischer's avatar

This reminded me about two posts I wrote:

1. Money is not a costly signal. Just because someone hired you it does not mean that they really want to change. Maybe it is just to calm down their conscience. Think of gym subscriptions.

https://djkunar.substack.com/p/money-is-not-a-costly-signal

2. I often compare Agile Coaches to Diet Coaches. If you taught the basics and there is no change, go for one of the other two out of three options: Love it, change it, leave it.

https://djkunar.substack.com/p/change-agents-need-to-make-tough

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