This Moment!
I read this beautiful post by Robert Waldinger on LinkedIn the other day. I’m going to paste it below in its entirety—
For a long time, I assumed that if I worked hard enough at understanding human happiness, I would eventually be able to solve it in my own life.
After all, I was a psychiatrist. And I had the unusual privilege of directing the Harvard Study of Adult Development: a project that has followed people’s lives for decades, trying to understand what makes for a good life.
And yet, much of the time, I didn’t feel particularly happy. Often, I didn’t even feel fully alive.
This puzzled me. I could see clearly how small shifts in perspective helped the people I worked with in therapy. I could see patterns in the research—what tended to nourish wellbeing, and what didn’t.
But insight didn’t automatically translate into experience.
Around that time, I became curious about Zen.
As I started my practice, what I began to notice, over time, was a habit of mind: a constant movement toward the next problem to solve, the next thing to fix.
Even in moments that were objectively “good,” the experience was often brief—more relief than joy—before attention shifted again to what might go wrong, or what needed improvement.
It’s a familiar pattern for many of us, especially those of us trained to analyze, improve, and achieve.
At some point, I began to wonder whether the issue wasn’t that I hadn’t yet found the right solution—but that I was approaching my life as an endless series of problems to be solved.
My practice didn’t eliminate difficult thoughts or feelings, but invited me to observe them more closely. To notice how quickly the mind constructs narratives. How easily those made-up narratives seem like reality. And how much effort goes into trying to rearrange experience into something more acceptable.
That shift in attention didn’t “fix” my life. But it did begin to change my relationship to it.
Instead of asking, “ What’s wrong, and how do I fix it?” another question started to emerge:What if this moment isn’t a problem to solve?
It’s a small shift, but not an easy one. And it’s one I still need to return to, again and again.
You might try it yourself, just for a moment. And see what happens.
I’m encouraged to try this presence experiment by asking—
What is this moment teaching me?
What is this moment trying to emerge for me?
What is this moment in my life journey?
What IS this moment?
Simply observing every moment with curiosity. Savoring them and appreciating them. Embracing them and joining them. Loving them.
I’m starting to do it and curiously wait to see what unfolds for me.
Stay agile, my friends,
Bob.
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